Boomer's Odyssey

A hound dog is going to be a hound no matter what you do, that is just what he is. Boomer, my beagle has a nose like a hoover vacuum. He doesn't lick anyone ever, but he will smell every square inch of your body to see where you have been. Before he was neutered if he heard anyone near the front door he would hide just out of sight and as soon as the door was cracked he ran outside to sniff the neighborhood. I had always wondered why dogs nostrils have the little slits on the side, and now I know. Boomer would run with his head down, nose pressed against the pavement like a kid looking in the window at a department store on Christmas. Those slits are so he doesn't suffocate.



We always were worried that Boomer would get hit by a car since he never looked where he was going, he just sniffed and howled and barked as he wandered up and down the street. He never took a straight path, and he wouldn't walk too fast until you snuck up behind him. He would sprint just out of reach and begin sniffing again. Sometimes it took us hours to catch him. Catching Boomer was like a Benny Hill skit, it would make you laugh if you dubbed 'Yakkity Sax' over us stumbling to catch him.

Boomer is a special beagle, he is part of the beagle royal family. He is also the only dog I know with a tattoo, I'm not joking. The family made an executive decision to neuter the poor boy so he wouldn't be so eager to go out and chase the bitches, or whatever it is beagles do.

Boomer slowed down quite a bit after his bag of balls was surgically turned into just a bag, a deflated flesh balloon. He gained some weight, he loafed a lot more, but he still wanted to be outside, and he still sniffed all of the house guests. The only thing the surgery did was make him a little easier to catch as there was more to grab onto when he got out.



The county fair came to town and set up shop across from my house through a field. Me and the guys figured out that we could sneak in the back way and not pay the 5 dollar entrance fee, that was until the county got smart and put redneck momma's on four wheelers to patrol the field. It was like a game to sneak into the fair. I never cared for the rides, or the pageant but I always enjoyed the carnies working. If you would make eye contact they would try to get you to play their game. Carnies get a bad wrap, but they are unbelievable salesmen, if only they bathed and had teeth they could make a killing selling cars.

After the first night of the fair I came home to find Boomer was missing. I walked around the neighborhood calling his name. I didn't find him, I went to sleep expecting to be woken up by him scratching at the front door. The next morning I woke up abruptly with a horrible thought. What if someone from the fair nabbed him, he is a beautiful dog, very friendly. Sure, he is overweight, but that is the American way. Me and Luke walked to the fair grounds and asked the carnies if they had seen Boomer, no one had.

Two days later we had passed through the denial stage and started to accept that some carny, or other fair goer now had a new beagle. We knew no one could love him as much as us though. I thought to myself that someone would bring him home, he had tags, there is no excuse for anyone to keep him.

I had to work that day and showed up at Sears with a tie and a frown. I was not in the mood to work. When I got to the electronics department I opened up the video game case and began to put up the newest shipment of games that no one else bothered to do. I was sitting in the back of the electronics department on the floor with my legs spread with a box full of video game in front of me. I began to hear a whimper, a loud cry, and then a loud howl. I looked up and saw Boomer with his nose pressed against the carpet run towards me. He looked up and jumped on top of me and began screaming and shouting and howling. A lady came over and said, "I'm sorry, I walked in the door in tools and that dog just darted in behind me. He ran straight to this department."

I began to shake and cry, Boomer had found me. He had just gotten lost. He picked up my scent in the parking lot of Sears and followed his nose right to me. I left work and drove the 1.5 miles home. When we got home Boomer slurped up so much water and ate an entire bowl of food. He then took a long nap, he was home. I felt like I was living Homeward Bound.